And now for something completely different.

I always figured that I would get a breathalyzer test before my son.  NOPE!
This morning I received a call from the Asst. Principal of Sterling's school.  Mr. Hepissedmeoff told me he had received an anonymous tip from another student's parent.   My son was accused of drinking peppermint schnapps before school.
The Asst. Principal asked if Sterling was drinking peppermint schnapps.  He told him no. My son told the Asst. Principal that I do not drink.  He told the Asst Principal that we don't have booze in our house. They gave Sterling a little oral test strip.  He put it in his mouth.  It came up positive.  They asked Sterling if it was ok if they brought in a cop and did a breathalyzer.  He told them yes.  He had nothing to fear as he had not drank any booze.  Behold...0.00 blood alcohol level.  When asked what he had eaten/drank this morning, to give a false positive with the oral strip,  he told them he had hot chocolate with vanilla extract.  (vanilla extract has alcohol.)  No mother...he's not getting drunk on vanilla extract.

Hey Mr. Asst Principal...I bet that was a bit traumitizing for my son...how about an apology?  I would like to show up at your school tomorrow to figure out why.  I don't think that would make you happy. 

I guess some kid wanted to be an asshole and get my kid in trouble.  Some kid told his mother that Sterling was telling people that he was drinking peppermint schnapps before school.  This kids Ma falsely narced out my son.  Who's drinking now?
I talked to my boy after school.  He denied drinking any booze, ever.  He denied telling kids he was drinking booze.  He didn't know what that booze was.  Gave him a hug.  Asked if everything was alright. 
He was fine.

The Asst Principal told me that the false tip giver would remain anonymous.  I have questions for the anonymous false tip giver.  (or douchbag chickenshit afraid to talk to me and maybe you should question all of the shit that your kid says...as you will now be referred to as.)  Where is my son's apology?  Why don't you get shit on for falsely accusing my son.  Know that I am angry.  I want your kid to cry...just like you made my kid cry.

It's been a while since my "father must protect his family at all costs" protective sense has showed up.  But it's here now.  Here to stay for awhile.  Protective dad is angry! Protective dad wants to type many mean sounding things...but as this is public...he will not.  Protective dad wants his pound of flesh.  He's gonna get it.  That'll be another story.